Monday, January 6, 2020

And here we are...

In a little over an hour it will be my birthday.  My 40th birthday.  It is a day that (despite all logic and common sense), I never thought would actually arrive.  And quite frankly?  I am NOT amused.  I am too young to be this old.  I haven't accomplished anything that I wanted to do by the time I reached "middle age".  If I wasn't so dejected I'd be crying right now.  Heck, I WANT to cry, but my stupid antidepressants won't even let me get that right!

So anyway, I'm sitting here all alone next to a Christmas tree that has also seen better days, with the mundane sound of my laundry running in the background, and I'm trying to psych myself up for attempt number one zillion at getting a life.  They say it begins at 40 right?  Well I'm gonna put that theory to the test

On the other hand, I still don't WANT to be this old!  So I've decided that since I was born in January of 1980, I was born in a leap decade!  (It could be a thing!)  Which means that in 67 minutes I will be 4 birthdays old!  Hah!  Still younger than my brother who was born on February 29th and is about to turn 11 I will be 4.0!  A newer and better version than 3.9 and DEFINITELY better than 2.1 or (yikes!  Beta!) 0.6.

This is the year I intend to FINALLY get my book published.  (I'm sooooooooooo close!)  I will FINALLY get off my butt and get into shape.  (I'm sooooooooooo NOT close!)  And hopefully I will also find a little bit of self-respect!  (I'm sooooooooooooo confused by the concept!)

And in the meantime, I will try to actually post once in awhile.  (Woohoo!  Over 2 years since I last bothered!)